good thing i wasn't at the airport

I had my very first mammogram today. If you're a dude or haven't had one yet, the technician first tapes tiny metal beads to your nipples and then proceeds to squeeze your melons betwixt plates of glass. So relieved that the procedure was over, I rushed to dress and head out to the reception area.

A bit later, the PIG and I were headed to my house when I started digging under my shirt. He probably thought I was having some sort of itch fest, as I am prone to allergic hives and the like, but then he made out from my mumbling that I had tape on my nipples. He laughed as I pulled two pieces of tape from beneath my shirt, metal beads still affixed.