think i've got it down

Lately I've been puzzled over my curious lack of emotion. I know I've written about being angry about things, and I have been, but the last time I checked there was more on the EmotionWheel than "cranky". While I have yet to determine the cause of this ailment, here are my current theories:
1. Suffering from SSAD, southern seasonal affective disorder. Unlike its partner, SAD, SSAD comes about when northerns move to southern climes and are overcome by too much post-September sunshine.
2. Aliens stole my brain and left me with a hologram.
3. Like when babies suddenly fall asleep after too much sensory stimulation, the emotion part of my brain shut down after a prolonged period of sadness, giddiness, insane jealousy and an unfounded sense of accomplishment.
4. There's really nothing to get excited about.