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in the hoosegow

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

spider pig, spider pig

So my new job begins tomorrow with a 1 1/2 day retreat. (Note to self: remember to pack pajamas!) Not sure if I should take it as a sign that my assigned food to bring is bacon. Bacon is, of course, food of the gods, but being a vegematarian I'm not so excited about having to purchase it from the store. Ah well...

Freaked the PIG out last night by refusing ice cream. I figured as I had just polished off 3 pieces of pizza, I should do the right thing. I finally had my leftover Ethiopian food for lunch. We got it on Friday night, so I'm crossing my fingers that it all goes through okay. If not, I have plenty of intestinal medication leftover from my last bout of food poisoning and our trip to Trinidad. There is something very decadent about being in my BF's apartment in the middle of the day. The dogs are snoozing, the stereo is doing its best to fray my nerves with its incessant classical "music" and I'm drinking an RC cola. Unfortunately I now have to go buy the meat.

Monday, July 30, 2007

daytime tv is r-tarded

You're probably wondering how it feels to be free of ye olde place of work. Well, frankly, it feels fine. I spent the day taking care of some long-neglected errands and reading The Sex Lives of Cannibals, which one of my pals recommended recently. I've got about 50 pages left and I'll be sad to see it go. Or I would be if I didn't have several other tomes awaiting perusal, like HP. I've spent some extra time hanging out with da puppies (who are pretty much surrounding me as I type) and kitty pants and enjoying all of the new cd's I got as I drive back and forth and back and forth between my house and the PIG's house.

For the most part I'm feeling pretty normal, which I'm taking as a good sign.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

rollin' with ally

I got to go swimming with the fam last night. They have a lovely pool in their condo complex and for some reason I'd never taken them up on pool privileges in the past. Anyhoo, the baby "I am NOT your little baby!" busily swam around while I played with the speedboat & boogie board and A. blew up the alligator. Once it was suitably plump, the baby tried to ride on it, but it kept bucking her off. It took two of us to keep her on and above water. I moved the gator away and tried to leap on, holding the little handles located somewhere around its shoulders. For a minute, Success! Then the inevitable: the ally took me into a death roll. I came up defeated, coughing out approximately 3 gallons of water.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

bzzzt wishes

One of my colleagues made me this cake. Can you see that it's covered in marzipan bees? It may be the food coma talking, but I think it's a lovely tradition to send someone off with a large social meal. I have always loved a potluck and I'm sure there will be many in my future. Right this second I should be cleaning out my office, but I am in the midst of the aforementioned coma (and still snacking on the black bean and sweet potato burrito that I put in my office when no one was looking) and I've been taking things off my wall in a very orderly fashion but I'm now up to a poster that is very close to the ceiling and I can't reach the push pins.

I'm even starting to feel a little sad that I'm leaving, but if I had to quit my job in order to get a cake with marzipan bees, it was totally worth it.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

what makes me happy

1. Sitting around with the PIG and realizing that if I play my cards right, I get to do that for a long, long time.

2. Cleaning out of my office and unearthing heirloom treasures of a sort: ancient handouts, thank you cards of olde, a pack of cute bookmarks I brought back from a conference.

3. The number of people who've said, "It won't be the same here without you."

4. Jogging with the fam, even if one of them is going to defect, I mean move away.

5. Friends who make things. Thoughtful, cute, funny things. You know who you are!

6. Kittybelly, especially when kittyback was facing me just a second ago.

Monday, July 23, 2007

what make me sad

I figured that when I decided to leave, my job, outreach li-berrian, would be discontinued. I am a rare beast, after all, with my passion for serving the community and school groups. Most "outreach" at academic li-berries consists of marketing to the campuses they serve. Still, I hoped that I was underestimating my administrators. Turns out I wasn't. It seems a shame. Enrollment is down here and most of our students come from the surrounding area (over 21,000 from our county alone), so doesn't it make sense that we should be helping out the university by showing off one of our most important resources?

Apparently not.


The PIG and I attended a party Saturday afternoon which was overrun with babies. I mean, it's like pregnancy was a disease that all of these women caught within a year of each other. I counted at least 7 small children and I've probably missed a few. The funnier thing is that most of the couples are European--mainly Dutch & German--so that a majority of the wee ones were towheads. Our friends came with their baby and I walked around a corner to see her in the PIG's arms. My mouth fell open because he, well, he doesn't exactly love children. Apparently our friend passed the baby over without giving him a chance to protest and he passed her back to me pretty quickly. I wish I'd had my camera to capture the moment because it isn't likely to be repeated anytime soon.

Saturday, July 21, 2007


You're The Poisonwood Bible!

by Barbara Kingsolver

Deeply rooted in a religious background, you have since become both
isolated and schizophrenic. You were naively sure that your actions would help people,
but of course they were resistant to your message and ultimately disaster ensued. Since
you can see so many sides of the same issue, you are both wise beyond your years and
tied to worthless perspectives. If you were a type of waffle, it would be

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Oh no, I hated that book so much that I left it with just a few pages to go. Why couldn't I have been Siddhartha or something?

Friday, July 20, 2007

why i'm leaving

There comes a time when you realize that you're good at your job, good enough to go to the next level, but there is no "next level" type opportunity available, or there is but you have to move away. I'm listening to myself during a workshop we just held, having prepared very little and yet having a lot to say, and similarly yesterday during a book club meeting, and I'm realizing that this truly is why I've taken another job. The challenge just isn't there anymore. I'm not trying to say I'm perfect (far from it, yes?) but that I've come as close to mastering the skills of my job as I'm likely to get. I need new skills to master.

In other news, we ate at Bluefish last night. I am still full, almost. We had dumplings and tempura and an avocado roll (that one was all me) and then I had an order of virgin island tofu. Well, I ate half of it at the restaurant and the rest later. That food makes me enter into some lesser kind of nirvana.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

the thing and the stuff

When my colleague first saw me back in the office this morning, she said, "So how was the gay Quaker wedding?"

It was quiet and much more of a dignified affair than many a wedding I've attended, let me tell you. No one sitting near me fell asleep and we all got to sign the marriage document. The after-wedding party was at one of my favorite restaurants and I got a chance to catch up with old friends whom I hadn't seen in a few years.

The next day we drove 1 1/2 hours to see my dad & stepmom. That was a lot of fun and also so typical. We spent about half an hour walking around the yard! After lunch we drove on to the b&b in my sister's town (the one with the kids, if you're paying attention) and then to my sister's house to have dinner with the fam. We spent about 4 1/2 hours on the road in total. I was whipped.

Weird things that happened:
1. I had wrapped up a gift for my mom in a few pairs of undies. The gift (a marble dolphin) made a dark, ugly stain. I washed out the undies (stain intact, boo!) and then accidentally left them hanging from the window cranks in my sister's bedroom. Oops!

2. The B&B room we'd booked smelled like cat pee. There was no one around to greet us, or to give us breakfast the next morning, for that matter, so we moved into another room. Emily's Room. Hanging on the walls were creepy, wispy christening dresses that moved in the slightest breeze. Apparently the place is haunted, the owner told us on our second morning (yay, breakfast!) although she appeared not to believe in the sightings of Emily.

3. My family love the PIG. Okay, that's not really a "weird thing" and in fact it was nice. He & my bro-in-law talked shop while I played outside with my nephew. Here's another hilarious thing--we were busy playing with sticks and the neph came up with the idea that we should start an International Stick Channel. Clearly an untapped market! Target audience: six year old boys with active imaginations.

Friday, July 13, 2007

black bird, not singing

I don't know if there's something wrong with me or what. When I was leaving the li-berry last night, there were a few guys in front. They were looking off to the left at a bird. One said, "It's dead!" and the other was not convinced, but when I looked again, it was clear that the bird was indeed dead. It was sitting at an odd angle with its mouth open and it wasn't moving at all. As I continued, I remembered that the batteries in my camera were dead and I was very disappointed.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

pretty good

We interviewed a potential new li-berrian today and she asked us, "How do you like working here?" It took all of my mental powers to keep from responding, "Did I mention I'm leaving in a few weeks?" I thought back to all of the other interviews I'd sat in on (oh so many, over the years) and how many times I thought that this place is overall pretty good. I guess I still think that, but it's become a place that's not so great for me in particular. When I announced yesterday to my faculty that I'm leaving, I received several responses in return, like ten, and that surprised me. It's hard to feel like you're making an impact, sometimes, and it's nice to know that I did make an impact on their and their students' lives.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

more bad jokes

We discussed teaching portfolios at today's brownbag and one of the preparatory exercises my colleague did was to come up with a metaphor for her teaching. I asked if others' metaphors were humanistic (probably not the correct word--anthropoid perhaps?) and she said that they tended to be. "For instance," I said, "Did anyone describe herself as a tree, with students building nests in her branches?" Laughter. "I often describe myself as a wrangler, although I'm not sure what of," I went on to babble. "Goats maybe? They tend to eat anything without discriminating and if one does something, all the other goats do it too."

This is why I should not be allowed to eat and ruminate at the same time.

msg is bad for me

For dinner yesterday I had one of my old favorite treats, fried rice, from a very cheap but tasty place. I stopped frequenting it when things went south between me and the formerly GE. Anyhoo, I ate a whole buncha rice last night and then started to feel crappy. The back of my head felt weird, I felt more itchy than usual and I had a fiercesome thirst. I woke up this morning with a lingering headache and general swelling. The culprit? MSG! Yes, it makes things extra tasty, but it makes my body go crazy. I threw away the leftover rice to make sure I wouldn't be tempted...

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

robots and parties

So the PIG and I went to see Transformers on Saturday. So loud, so shiny, so fun. The plot was a bit weak, but it was outstanding compared to the cartoon version (please don't kill me for saying that, Transformers geeks!). Fans of Josh Duhamel will have lots to drool over, fans of John Turturro will have lots to laugh at, fans of cgi, well, that's the whole movie, so they'll be happy. Fans of folio should have watched Sunday Morning on cbs this weekend because they did a whole segment on Transformers sound, from dialog to effects to score. I had my usual complaint, that the fight scenes were too long and too loud.

Sunday the PIG accompanied me to a party of folks who make up the volunteer spine of the school I'll soon be working at. Administrators were also in attendance. We spent time in the pool and I took it upon myself to sample every dessert (and there were several, including the caramel apple crisp that I made). They were all good but I didn't have seconds of anything except for the strawberries and whipped cream. The PIG was very tolerant of the crazies that I call my friends and colleagues (actually he likes my current colleague and her husband very much. i can only hope the same will be true for my new colleagues) and I count myself lucky that I haven't had to hang with his co-workers yet. Not that I'm dreading it or anything...

Friday, July 06, 2007


I signed my new contract today. I brought back a packet of info on all kinds of insurance, disability coverage, etc. and an armload of forms to fill out. I have twelve and a half more days of work here (3 days of vacation betwixt now and Quittin' Time), not that I'm counting the days or anything. I feel sort of "ehh" about leaving, actually. I thought I'd feel more "whoo hoo, I am Blowing This Popsicle Stand"ish, but surprisingly I'm not. I will be sad to dismantle my office

and leave behind my kiosk

I'll be working with the likes of these folks, and that makes me happy.

Thursday, July 05, 2007

did you know "gospel" means good news?

I'm leaving soonish (August 1) to begin work at the Monarch School. They're offering me a challenge and a good deal as a teacher in their Life Academy. It will be a big change, going from higher ed to just plain ed (some may consider it special ed, but that's not really important to me), going from a completely flexible schedule to a very set day, going from seeing students once or twice to seeing the same kids each day of the school year, but I see the benefits as far outweighing the discomfort I might feel during the transition.

I hope I'm right.

I plan to keep posting here, as this has never been a "li-berry" blog but a space for me to sometimes talk about li-berrian stuff. For the sake of the kids' privacy I won't be able to tell you much about my new job but I'm sure there will be some amusing anecdotes that I can slip by my internal censor.

On the whole, people have been very excited for me and only one let me see how dismayed he was that I am leaving. That actually made me feel good, because we've worked together on a lot of projects and I know he'll miss me as a colleague. I hope y'all will be happy for me too.

Monday, July 02, 2007

i heart ellipsis

Of no surprise to anyone, I'm sure.

Your Score: ellipsis

You scored 46% Sociability and 70% Sophistication!

Your life can be difficult because of your insecurities, but you should know that it isn't your fault. YOU didn't ask to be thrown in around thirty times per page in every bodice-ripper on the shelf! Those who overuse you can kiss your . . . you know. You need to learn to hold your head high and glory in your solitude. You really do have excellent, scholarly tastes. You must never forget that your friend, the period, will be there to support you at the end of every sentence where you truly belong, and, if what is left out is as important as what is said, why, then you are as vital as the alphabet!

Link: The Which Punctuation Mark Are You Test written by on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

back in the saddle, sort of

Back to my "real" job today. So far I've gone through twelve tons of email and am trying to get mentally caught up. It's tough on a fuggy, rainy day like today. I wish I were at home with the kitty hiding in one of her kitty bunkers.

I got some boxes of stuff that we ordered for giveaways. The coolest things to arrive so far are the multi-colored eraser sticks, although the clip-on card pouches with the library's logo are pretty spiff. Even they can't make me feel like I am back where I belong, though. I miss my kiddlies, even the challenging, bratty ones.